I haven’t cried for a long time.

I’ve buried these colors, these emotions, under other colors

Like hiding green inside blue…

Hiding grief in a bored “I’m okay”

Hiding love in a “How’ve you been?”

I haven’t said my piece, haven’t bled through this

Band aid called a smile…

But today I woke up and the world’s misery was

Swimming through my veins like black dye,

Coloring all my moments…

What if what people think is “Depression”

Is really Love, but love for the world, and you think

It’s background noise, just static, it’s just the sound of nature or

The highway

But really, it’s people crying and

It’s not in your back yard, no, it’s somewhere in another country

Where you had no idea your heart was tied up….

It isn’t even on your continent, but see

Emotions aren’t in the brain, they aren’t tied to you like wires,

This is the way YOU feel, part of your spiritual grounding—

We weep inside when we don’t even know why

It’s the people we forgot we cared for,

The brothers and sisters we lost, eons ago, when we split into these small colonies of


But without remembering that those souls are part of our soul, we think,

“This is just another gloomy day.”

Or “maybe I need medication”

To take these blues and greens and turn them


To stop our hearts from feeling what they are missing—

To cement these walls

That hold us

In solitude.



Lane D.

November 16 2015